Note to reader: the title of the post is a means of therapy for me. I've found that unless you have sisters, a mom you can talk to about anything, or close girlfriends, women don't usually talk about all the gross details of being a woman. (Parts 1 & 2 are in draft mode; later topics to come as well.)
GESTATIONAL DIABETES
Last Friday I had my 24-week OB appointment and endured the hour-long drink-the-nasty-crap-and-wait-for-your-blood-to-be-drawn glucose test. It wasn't as bad and I had expected it to be (let's be honest, as other people had warned me it would be). I psyched myself out. But the stuff didn't taste THAT bad, the waiting was fine--although the receptionist did say that I would have my appointment with the doctor during that hour, and she lied--and the blood draw was practically painless. No problem. When I finally met with the doctor, she said they'd have the results on Monday and that no news was good news. Awesome. I've got this. I'm fine.
So today, when the doctor's office number showed up on my phone as a missed call, I was not-so-fine anymore. Uh... you have news? Shoot.
I called back nervously, figuring that they just wanted to settle my fears and tell me that the test results were normal. Wrong again. The nurse explained that they want my blood sugar level to be under 135 and that mine was at 136. One stinking point! One point!! So as a result, I have to go back for a three hour glucose test where I'll drink twice as much of the nasty stuff, then wait three hours during which time they'll draw my blood FOUR times. THOSE results will tell them if I have gestational diabetes.
Before today, I've never known anyone personally who had gestational diabetes (my co-worker, who heard me crying on the phone* came over to talk to me; she went through the same thing two years ago and did have gestational diabetes). And before that, when I did hear about someone else having it, it always sounded so scary and serious. Like bed rest. So my first reaction was fear. I don't know enough about it to understand it, so I'm scared. I thought I had done something to harm my baby, but was told over and over that this isn't my fault. I worried that this meant I gave my baby diabetes. That's devastating to think about, and so not fair to him!! Luckily, also not true.
I pray every day for a healthy baby, so hearing the term "gestational diabetes," I let my mind wander to dark unknown places and blamed myself for this (possible) diagnosis. As it turns outs, the greatest worry for the doctors is that my baby would be born big. My co-worker told me that her doctor warned her of a 9 pound baby, so they induced her a week early. Her son was a beautiful, healthy, 6 lb. 15 oz. boy, perfectly healthy (and absolutely adorable!) Okay, I feel a little better. My sister told me of her friend that also had gestational diabetes, and her 7-month-old daughter is in the 6th percentile for growth now.
So I know what the implications can be if the expectant mother doesn't follow doctor's orders (strict diet, testing your blood, etc.) but it really isn't the end of the world. I have psyched myself out again, but I know that my going back for the second round of testing doesn't necessarily mean I have it. My first result was so low, that it might turn out just fine. Then again, it might turn out that I have it, and the next 15 1/2 weeks will be challenging, but doable. There are some women that deal with much more serious things during their pregnancy. I will be fine.
My problem has always been that I like all the wrong foods (just ask my mother). I also just really like food period, so I've struggled with weight most of my life. In fact, I was worried that I would not handle the pregnancy weight gain well (10 pounds up so far, and about 15 or more to go--yikes!) but I know that there is a greater reason to gain weight, and bikini season (HA!) will just have to wait. Luckily, summer will just about be over by the time I imagine being anywhere near (or wanting) to shove myself into a swimsuit. Phew!! This little guy is already worth every pound though.
So, I called and scheduled the dreaded 3 hour test for Friday morning this week; the nurse said I could do it anytime in the next two weeks, but I didn't want to dwell on it any longer than I had to. I'm just going to go and get it over with. I'll update with the results once I have them.
That being said, if you're a praying woman and you're reading this, please say a prayer for my health--both physical and mental--during this testing. Like I said, I know it isn't probably as serious as I'm making it, but I am taking it seriously and hoping for the best. God is in control. I emailed my mom earlier to say that I know that God is the one making this baby, I just get to keep him warm while he grows and make sure that I'm doing right by him. In the diet category, I think I can do better.
*My number one rule is that I don't cry at work. I broke my own rule today. Fail.
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